Lindsey: Put on weight again

I am the World Champion of yo-yo dieting. I get chubby, I go on a diet, I lose some weight, I get fed up of being on a diet, I relax a little, I put weight on again. This is the cycle of my life. Every time I lose weight, I say I’m never going to let it go on again, but then something happens and I end up piling on the pounds.

The most recent ballooning is caused by a knee injury I picked up two and a half years ago, which required really gross surgery and prevented me from doing any exercise for almost a year. Then on top of that was a crushing lack of any sort of motivation or willpower as a result of having a particularly difficult couple of years with family stuff. I’m a comfort eater. If times are tough, I reach for the chocolate. And Doritos. And Wham bars.

Brilliant, now I’m hungry.

I’m never going to be skinny. I’m not built to be skinny, I have hips that prevent me from entering narrow doorways without turning sideways and shoulders that make me look like a Russian shot-putter. Even without the flab, I’m what a kind person would call “curvy.” I’d like to be slightly less fat than I am though. And I have been, several times, in the periods between my ‘ballooning events’. The latest ballooning event leaves me with about 20lbs I want to lose.

So, here I am again, embarking on a diet inspired by my Florida photos. When I was looking through the photos, it took me a while to figure out that the bespectacled hippo who had appeared to have gatecrashed every photo was in actual fact me. I know I look in the mirror every day, but there’s something about a photo of yourself, with your rolls of flab on proud display (especially when you’re wearing holiday clothes), that makes your blood run cold.

I’ve been dieting really strictly for two weeks now and I’ve lost 4 1/4 lbs. Go me. I’m back at the gym regularly, and I haven’t wavered. Every time I’m tempted to buy a massive bag of Doritos, I think of that hippo in Florida. I may even resort to sticking my holiday photos on all my cupboards and the fridge at home to deter me from eating. But, man, do I wish that I hadn’t piled it on in the first place. That I really regret.

Time to return to my low-cal soup and Diet Coke. *sigh*


Who is Lindsey?

Hi! I’m Lindsey. Although I haven’t had WLS, I have struggled with my weight since childhood. I’ll be blogging here from time to time with updates on how I’m trying to keep myself trim, my ups and downs at the gym and lots of other weight-related issues.